Countdown...

So the countdown was on! We had 4 weeks until F was due, and each day felt like an eternity.

But we had alot to do. This was going to be a private, domestic adoption, with no agency involved. We had to find a local attorney to handle the hospital birthplan, termination of parental rights, and eventually, the adoption finalization.

We needed to get the basic necessities (my jaded, bitter self refused to believe that this was really real, so there was no way that I was going to buy loads of baby stuff to have sitting around my house.) We ended up getting a car seat, and 1 outfit - 2 things we needed if baby girl was actually going to be ours.

We found an attorney, who I will call the Ice Queen (this is actually me being nice, just in case there are those who are easily offended). Ice Queen's first offending remark:

"Are you sure you want to do this, you are so young and there are so many advances in medical technology now? "

Gee - really? I'm so glad you told me about this, maybe I should reconsider. I will definitely make an appointment to see my doctor, and maybe - just maybe - with another 20k, we will be successful.

Offending comment #2 "Well, you are so pretty, so I am sure you will find a baby quickly. That is really what birthmothers look for. "

Because if I looked like a sea hag, I would suck as a mom? Um, thanks. It never ceases to amaze me how stupid people really are.

Ice Queen was hired because we were under the gun, didn't have many options, and needed to get a plan in action. Needless to say, she would prove to be a real PITA.

So I introduced F to the Ice Queen so that they could get information together for the hospital social worker. F needed to be advised of all of her rights, and I wanted to make sure that everyone was on the same page.


The queen also had also set up a meeting for us that we never expected to have.

BZ, the birthdad, wanted to meet us.

Up to this point, he knew about the adoption plan, was supportive of it, but F said that he didn't want to be involved - so we were surprised that he wanted to meet.

The queen set up a meeting with us and BZ, at another mall closer to our home. B and I spotted him right away, and we introduced ourselves. We sat and talked and he told us about himself. He was 37, had a 15 year old daughter, and drove a truck for a living. BZ told us that he wanted things to work out between him and F, but that it wasn't an option. He knew that he couldn't provide for the baby, but he just wanted to meet us to make sure he was doing the right thing. I thought it was very admirable of him. Though we only briefly spoke, BZ seemed like a really good guy who genuinely had the best interest of baby girl in mind. I was really glad we got to meet him.

We still hadn't told anyone about F, and weren't planning on it. We borrowed a crib and changing table that 3 of my nieces had used, and waited some more.

Thankfully summer vacation was just around the corner!